Effie Britannia

Oh dear Effie

(Last Updated On: 19th April 2015)

We interrupt this party political broadcast on behalf of the people of Gordon for an important news item. Effie Deans has published a post on her blog titled, “We must attack the SNP at its roots.” That’s right, get in among them like a dose of roundup.

You may have come across Effie before, she is an advocate of tactical voting. Especially in the constituency of Gordon where she hopes this will prevent the SNP candidate from being elected. Effie spent some time in the USSR, of which she has fond memories. She sees parallels between the break up of the USSR and the current state of the UK, of which she is particularly fond. She is also an ardent opponent of nationalism. Effie sees nationalism as a great evil, one which must be stopped at all costs.

But I’ll give her credit, she has got right to the root of Scottish nationalism and it boils down to this: do you think of Scotland as a country? It really is as simple as that. For Effie, Scotland is not a country, it is a region of a larger entity called United Kingdom. It’s just a part of something greater. For me, Scotland is a country and it should have the ability to manage its resources for the benefit of the people who live here. Effie laments that all of the economic arguments against independence are ignored by the nationalists. Most of the arguments against independence are economic and inherently selfish.

Effie believes that the final solution to Scottish nationalism is to disallow the assumption “Scotland is a country.” She even has a four point plan:

  1. Accept that UK is one nation.
  2. Ban all referendums.
  3. No deal with the elected representatives of the Scottish people should they be SNP.
  4. Bring about more unity into the UK and promote a feeling of common identity.

Effie is getting desperate, she is issuing a clarion call to the rest of the UK to give urgent assistance. It would appear that the SNP are winning. Her final recourse is to a grand coalition of unionist parties, a quicker route to the break up of the UK you couldn’t find.

Effie and I are mutually blocked on Twitter, and the reason is that I called her a British nationalist. Effie insisted that she wasn’t, then blocked me. But what about this quote from the post, “…remember, this is Britain. We always win.”

6 thoughts on “Oh dear Effie

  1. AvatarGEORGE

    We always win ? Seriously ? Has she forgotten her history ? The Afghans kicked our arses twice in the Afghan Wars. The Germans hoofed us back to Dunkirk in about two weeks in 39-40 Silly cow !

  2. AvatarVici Sokolov

    Ohhh help MA boab .. Those odd people North of Hadrians wall… Think they have a national identity! (better than England’s identity crisis) Well I’m just not gonna deal with them, so there!
    We want?? A common identity!! . With what? Pedophiles, unelected Lords, feed the rich by robbing the poor, 11.4% raise for Westminster wolves, and austerity for everyone else!! .
    Sorry thanks but NO THANKS you can keep that crud to the south of Watford Gap and within the square mile…

  3. AvatarAkm

    Well, lets not forget… We (Britain) invented the concentration camp, drug smuggling, theft of resources etc etc….

    We also for some reason couldn’t beat the Chinese, despite being ahead of them tech wise.


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